The Great SQL NASTY:

(or the story of how I got my first PAID freelancing job)

well actually, no, it is about how evil and messy Microsoft (AKA Skynet) products are. but you'll find that out for yourself soon enough:

A couple of guys i met decided they wanted organization websites for their.. er, organizations, one which was more like a database for people who want to register their names online in the organization which will then go forth to find them jobs and whatnot,

the other was a regular site with links, addresses, photo-albums, mission-statement etc etc etc

so anyway, i was told i'd have to build the sites, then assume Administration and Tech-Support roles, AND that they'd meet me in two days, that was 3 days ago:

now, i'm not very much into networking, i'm definitely a software-apps guy, and a little hardware influenced by my buddies V-Knight and Red Serpent.
so, naturally, while i knew how to setup an SQL database and query it OFFLINE, i had no clue how i can build an online interface/registration form and link it to the database and then proceed to getting/putting info into the DB:

so, after a little googling, i found this beautiful little tutorial:
Recipe: Deploying a SQL Database to a Remote Hosting Environment (Part 1)
Oooh! how sweet :)

now, there they said i'd need something called: "Database Publishing Wizard", so i went and got it, then, turns out i need something else called:

Microsoft Visual Web Developer, Express Edition

in order for this thing to even be installed, it needs:
Microsoft SQL Server 2005 Express,
Microsoft.NET framework 2.0,
Microsoft SQL Server Native Client
Microsoft SQL Server Management Objects,

aaaand MSXML 6.0 Parser and SDK (whatever the hell that means)

in short:
118.1 Megabytes of assorted crap spread out across the MSDN website.

now: if they so apparently need all these parts to work even, can't those overpaid zombies at MS at least collect them all into ONE INSTALLER PACKAGE????

THIS is why I LOVE BORLAND, Patron Saint of the Poor Programmer:
if you want to install the new Turbo C# (or any other tool), you CAN download the prerequisites each separately, or bunched up together in one big, happy file.

so anyway:
i install everything and build my own site complete with SQL database and all: but, the webspace i got for free (from the gracious people over at doesn't let me off that easy, and is not 100% compatible with Microsoft products. huff.

i wasted 15 straight hours of my life trying to get the freaking thing to work.
screw it. i'm using kiddie scripts.

this is a post of frustration:

This is Blasphemy,
This is Madness..

Anyway, one of them (they are two unrelated parties) was so gracious to actually offer me money to do the site, i mean, hey, i honestly tried to refuse and all, i DO have a reputation to keep, but he was very insistent: plus, he told me literally:

"We have to hire you so we can later fire you"
works just fine, if you ask me.

aaand its off to work we go. Hey Ho!
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